My observing report

As I drove up the winding road to my home observatory, I idly mused upon the subtle beauty of my 401K as I contemplated the crystal-clear skies. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 46 telescopes set up.

I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 2. It glowed, rather like all the other smudges I've ever looked at. With that checked off my list, I helped a beginner find NGC 1749 in Corvus. It was as bright as blackness. Next, I had a chance to see IC 271. It seemed almost a spitting cobra. Then, I glimpsed B 275. It reminded me of a nebula. Then, I hunted NGC 5618. It would be easy to confuse with Miss Piggy. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I had a chance to see B 18 in Fornax. It was a blurry likeness of a far-away cloud. Then, I looked at NGC 2931 in Cygnus. It appeared to be a far-away cloud. Then, I identified IC 844. It was a blurry likeness of an inflamed monkey butt. Then, I stumbled upon IC 3750. It sparkled like dandruff on black satin pajamas. With that checked off my list, I jumped to M 68. It was a dead ringer for a glimmer of the Big Bang. After that, I checked off M 59. It reminded me of the invisible man. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I went for NGC 1162. It took me back to the first time I saw spent coals, faintly glowing. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I found M 89. It would be easy to confuse with a little triangle. Then, for a real challenge, I stumbled upon IC 2534. It looked uncannily like a hamburger. (Hmm, it had been a while since dinner). With that checked off my list, I logged Abell 73. It was better than a whale spouting. Next, I had a chance to see M 16. It looked uncannily like the eternal nothingness of being. With that checked off my list, I jumped to B 40. It would be easy to confuse with the eternal nothingness of being. Then, for a real challenge, I stumbled upon B 612 in Hydra. It gave the appearance of a swarm of bees. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I tracked down B 498 in Draco. It was easy, just like ripples of water. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I observed Abell 88. It seemed most like an edge-on barred spiral with a sharp dust lane. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I added to my logbook B 336. It looked like whipped cream. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I identified Abell 28. It was easy, just like Alan Rickman.

Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than internet sex.


    ...Akkana (with help from David North, Jane Houston Jones, and Bill Arnett) .

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