My observing report

As I drove up the winding road to my backyard, I idly mused upon the inner workings of AP Refractors as I contemplated the threat posed by global warming. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 55 telescopes set up.

I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 67 in Cygnus. It was better than two scoops of spumoni ice cream. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I found M 71 in Camelopardalis. It shimmered, as if it were a Black Rider hunting for Frodo. Then, for a real challenge, I star-hopped to IC 2815 in Serpens. It was easy, just like the pillars of creation. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I showed some guests Abell 41. It was as bright as the last six objects I'd seen. Then, for a real challenge, I checked off M 57 in Ursa Minor. It appeared at low power like the exhaust from a diesel Suburban. Then, I hunted for B 181 in Ursa Major. It was as bright as an inflamed monkey butt. Then, I had a chance to see M 90. It seemed most like a far-away cloud. With that checked off my list, I star-hopped to B 292. It looked a bit like the eye of God. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I stumbled upon M 5. It was a blurry likeness of the clouds I'd seen earlier.

After a short break to converse with an owl, I identified B 158. It looked a bit like cotton candy. Then, for a real challenge, I hunted Abell 76. It was better than Gollum. Then, I located NGC 5356. It looked a bit like ripples of water. Then, I tried NGC 3815. It gave the appearance of a nebula. With that checked off my list, I slewed to NGC 3808. It sparkled like whispy tendrils of nebulosity. Next, I hunted for IC 49. It seemed most like the face of God. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I showed some guests IC 434. It sparkled like Dubya.

After a short break to chat, I identified M 48. It reminded me of a spitting cobra. After that, I glimpsed B 77. It seemed just like a spider. Then, I accidentally located M 89. It looked like an edge-on barred spiral with a sharp dust lane. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I slewed to Abell 57. It reminded me of diamonds on black velvet. Then, I stumbled upon Abell 96 in Canes Venatici. It compared favorably with the pillars of creation. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I slewed to M 88. It somewhat resembled smoke signals from a rampaging Iroquois band. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I logged M 42. It seemed just like R2-D2.

Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than hunting with the Vice President.


    ...Akkana (with help from David North, Jane Houston Jones, and Bill Arnett) .

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