My observing report

As I drove up the winding road to Devastated Area, I idly mused upon the study of the internet as I contemplated the low fog. Would it rise, or not?. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 51 telescopes set up.

I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 50. It sparkled like whispy tendrils of nebulosity. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I stumbled upon IC 3661. It was like the face of God.

After a short break to munch cheesy poofs, I helped a beginner find NGC 4646. It looked like a faint puff of nothingness, with a suspected, but not confirmed, central star.

After a short break to recite my mantra, I jumped to IC 347. It was even more difficult than cotton candy.

After a short break to have a smoke, I observed B 210 in Perseus. It was not quite as bright as that graph in An Unpleasant Truth. Next, I went for Abell 22. It seemed just like spent coals, faintly glowing. Then, I nudged my telescope to NGC 5778. It would be easy to confuse with a spider. Then, I found B 41 in Ursa Minor. It seemed just like a waterfall. With that checked off my list, I studied IC 2139 in Scutum. It seemed just like an edge-on barred spiral with a sharp dust lane. Then, for a real challenge, I hunted B 339. It appeared in the eyepiece like an inflamed monkey butt. Then, for a real challenge, I tried M 108 in Lepus. It was a dead ringer for two scoops of spumoni ice cream. Next, I accidentally located Abell 23 in Lyra. It was better than a swarm of bees. Next, I jumped to B 118 in Orion. It was better than two scoops of spumoni ice cream. Then, for a real challenge, I observed NGC 3767. It reminded me of a little triangle. With that checked off my list, I added to my logbook M 94. It appeared in the eyepiece like a smoke ring. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I accidentally located IC 3223 in Scorpius. It was not quite as bright as cotton on velvet. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I slewed to Abell 18. It looked exactly like all the other smudges I've ever looked at. After that, I showed some guests NGC 5961. It seemed almost the eternal nothingness of being. After that, I glimpsed NGC 5324 in Lyra. It was easy, just like blackness. Then, I looked at Abell 7. It reminded me of a spitting cobra.

Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than phone sex.


    ...Akkana (with help from David North, Jane Houston Jones, and Bill Arnett) .

(Don't forget to hit reload.)