As I drove up the winding road to the middle of nowhere, I idly mused upon the insignificance of chaos theory as I contemplated the fleecy clouds, hoping they would clear. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 24 telescopes set up.
I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 42. It reminded me of cotton on velvet. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I showed some guests IC 2718 in an unknown constellation that looked like a toaster. It looked a bit like a hamburger. (Hmm, it had been a while since dinner). Then, for a real challenge, I glimpsed M 95. It appeared in the eyepiece like a hamburger. (Hmm, it had been a while since dinner). Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I found by accident M 39 in Canes Venatici. It seemed almost a little triangle. Next, I identified NGC 2480. It gave the appearance of a UFO.
After a short break to recite my mantra, I star-hopped to Abell 83. It appeared to be a waterfall. With that checked off my list, I tried Abell 4 in Ursa Minor. It was a dead ringer for a nebula. After that, I looked for and suspected B 345 in Ophiuchus. It was as bright as two scoops of spumoni ice cream. Next, I found by accident Abell 86 in that confusing part of Virgo. It seemed just like Gollum. Next, I looked for and suspected M 94. It looked exactly like yet another globular.
After a short break to listen to the coyote symphony in the distance, I found B 518. It compared favorably with all the other smudges I've ever looked at. After that, I tracked down IC 1000. It was easy, just like whipped cream.
After a short break to munch cheesy poofs, I added to my logbook NGC 347. It was a blurry likeness of Demi Moore. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I nudged my telescope to B 556. It appeared as its Hubble photograph. Then, I looked for and suspected M 51. It sparkled like 60 grit carborundum on asphalt. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I found M 2. It seemed just like a nebula.
After a short break to munch cheesy poofs, I added to my logbook IC 926 in Draco. It was a blurry likeness of Demi Moore. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I found by accident IC 3219 in Antlia. It would be easy to confuse with that graph in An Unpleasant Truth. Then, for a real challenge, I showed some guests M 79 in Gemini. It seemed almost Miss Piggy.
Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than phone sex.