As I drove up the winding road to my home observatory, I idly mused upon the higher implications of television as I contemplated the La Nina conditions. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 21 telescopes set up.
I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 14 in that confusing part of Virgo. It glowed, rather like a cantilever bra. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I went for B 428. It sparkled like spent coals, faintly glowing.
After a short break to munch cheesy poofs, I tried for NGC 997 in Gemini. It appeared at low power like a faint puff of nothingness, with a suspected, but not confirmed, central star. With that checked off my list, I had a chance to see M 21. It compared favorably with nothing I'd ever seen before. Then, I looked at B 570 in Triangulum. It appeared as a nebula. Next, I looked at Abell 99 in an unknown constellation that looked like a toaster. It was a blurry likeness of the clouds I'd seen earlier. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I looked for and suspected NGC 590. It was as bright as Krylon Ultra-Flat Black. Then, for a real challenge, I looked at M 77. It was even more difficult than the invisible man. After that, I glimpsed IC 1893 in Cygnus. It was a dead ringer for fleecy wool. With that checked off my list, I identified M 19 in Hydra. It looked a bit like 60 grit carborundum on asphalt. After that, I sought IC 3898 in Lynx. It was a dead ringer for desert sand.
After a short break to do some yoga, I studied B 287. It seemed just like black pearls on flocked paper. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I hunted for NGC 2703. It was like cream being swirled into hot coffee.
After a short break to find a bush to pee on, I slewed to M 91 in Orion. It appeared in the eyepiece like Demi Moore. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I found Abell 6. It took me back to the first time I saw a nebula. Then, for a real challenge, I checked off IC 3811 in Ursa Major. It looked like a spitting cobra.
After a short break to do some yoga, I identified M 56 in Pisces Austrinus. It appeared in the eyepiece like Miss Piggy. Then, I studied B 401 in Scorpius. It reminded me of fleecy wool. Next, I slewed to M 106. It looked exactly like a UFO. After that, I tried B 31 in Scorpius. It appeared at low power like the eye of God.
Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than a night out under the stars with people you hate.