My observing report

As I drove up the winding road to another winding road only known to those from my support group, I idly mused upon the morality of my life's work as I contemplated the past week of rain. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 49 telescopes set up.

I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 42. It seemed most like Krylon Ultra-Flat Black. With that checked off my list, I accidentally located IC 2520. It was a dead ringer for a glimmer of the Big Bang. After that, I tried for NGC 612 in Triangulum. It took me back to the first time I saw cotton candy. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I tried for M 30. It was like Krylon Ultra-Flat Black. Next, I located NGC 4818. It reminded me of Smokey the Bear. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I looked for and suspected Abell 59. It would be easy to confuse with cotton candy. After that, I identified Abell 87. It was a blurry likeness of Dubya. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I star-hopped to B 348. It looked a bit like a nebula. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I jumped to Abell 43 in Ophiuchus. It looked a bit like Krylon Ultra-Flat Black. With that checked off my list, I tracked down M 79. It appeared at low power like nothing I'd ever seen before. Then, for a real challenge, I hunted NGC 3732. It was not quite as bright as desert sand. Next, I tried for IC 2576. It looked uncannily like smoke signals from a rampaging Iroquois band. Next, I accidentally located Abell 83. It was a dead ringer for Krylon Ultra-Flat Black. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I found IC 1608. It seemed just like the clouds I'd seen earlier. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I glimpsed B 473 in Camelopardalis. It appeared at low power like black pearls on flocked paper. After that, I observed M 96 in that confusing part of Virgo. It shimmered, as if it were fleecy wool. After that, I had a chance to see B 563. It appeared to be an inflamed monkey butt. Next, I helped a beginner find B 85. It glowed, rather like dancing elephants.

After a short break to find a bush to pee on, I checked off NGC 5845. It was not quite as bright as yet another globular.

After a short break to walk around, I located Abell 64. It appeared at low power like a nebula. Then, for a real challenge, I accidentally located Abell 59 in Scutum. It seemed just like cotton candy. Then, for a real challenge, I showed some guests Abell 8. It took me back to the first time I saw George W. Bush.

Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than cleaning the bathroom.


    ...Akkana (with help from David North, Jane Houston Jones, and Bill Arnett) .

(Don't forget to hit reload.)