My observing report

As I drove up the winding road to my home observatory, I idly mused upon the cosmological implications of the human spirit as I contemplated the past week of rain. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 13 telescopes set up.

I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 81. It was a blurry likeness of a spider.

After a short break to drink a slurpie, I sketched NGC 4315. It was like a faint puff of nothingness, with a suspected, but not confirmed, central star.

After a short break to enjoy a nutritious snack, I checked off Abell 78. It looked uncannily like a smoke ring. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I tracked down Abell 3 in Septans. It seemed just like yet another globular.

After a short break to cut some cheese, I sought M 36. It was even more difficult than a swarm of bees. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I sought B 405 in that confusing part of Virgo. It took me back to the first time I saw the clouds I'd seen earlier. With that checked off my list, I checked out NGC 5832 in Camelopardalis. It appeared at low power like the face of God. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I had a chance to see M 23 in Gemini. It was like Alan Rickman. Next, I showed some guests IC 3543. It appeared in the eyepiece like dandruff on black satin pajamas.

After a short break to listen to the coyote symphony in the distance, I accidentally located B 287. It was as bright as that graph in An Unpleasant Truth. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I went for NGC 5491 in Corvus. It was not quite as bright as a waterfall. With that checked off my list, I had a chance to see B 296. It was even more difficult than a cantilever bra. With that checked off my list, I identified M 15 in Sagittarius. It appeared in the eyepiece like Santa Claus. Next, I found by accident B 243. It appeared as a dodo bird, extinct but for this celestial likeness. Then, for a real challenge, I looked at NGC 6097. It seemed fainter than the eternal nothingness of being. Then, for a real challenge, I stumbled upon NGC 3151. It was a dead ringer for the exhaust from a diesel Suburban. With that checked off my list, I went for IC 3386 in Fornax. It appeared in the eyepiece like Krylon Ultra-Flat Black. Then, for a real challenge, I logged IC 2397 in Ursa Major. It sparkled like diamonds on black velvet. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I found Abell 22. It seemed most like blackness. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I star-hopped to NGC 811. It was easy, just like the pillars of creation. Then, I hunted M 88 in Lynx. It somewhat resembled the exhaust from a diesel Suburban. Then, I tried for IC 1796 in the western sky. It looked a bit like Gollum. Next, I added to my logbook NGC 1474 in Canes Venatici. It glowed, rather like that graph in An Unpleasant Truth.

Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than hunting with the Vice President.


    ...Akkana (with help from David North, Jane Houston Jones, and Bill Arnett) .

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