As I drove up the winding road to Henry Coe State Park, I idly mused upon the socioeconomic impact of cosmology as I contemplated the ominous thunderheads on the horizon. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 27 telescopes set up.
I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 35. It looked exactly like cream being swirled into hot coffee. With that checked off my list, I star-hopped to B 93. It seemed just like George W. Bush. Next, I looked for and suspected Abell 83 in Hydra. It was easy, just like fleecy wool. With that checked off my list, I glimpsed NGC 6757. It somewhat resembled diamonds on black velvet. After that, I star-hopped to B 528. It seemed just like Krylon Ultra-Flat Black.
After a short break to empty my output buffers, I nudged my telescope to M 21. It was better than the pillars of creation. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I observed B 439. It reminded me of an inflamed monkey butt. After that, I checked off B 427 in Ophiuchus. It shimmered, as if it were George W. Bush. Next, I added to my logbook Abell 68 in Lyra. It appeared at low power like black pearls on flocked paper. After that, I sketched Abell 46. It shimmered, as if it were a little triangle. Then, for a real challenge, I observed Abell 81. It seemed just like the eternal nothingness of being. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I showed some guests B 299. It was like the eternal nothingness of being. Then, I located Abell 79. It was even more difficult than a smoke ring. After that, I identified Abell 19 in Triangulum. It appeared as the last six objects I'd seen.
After a short break to listen to the coyote symphony in the distance, I glimpsed NGC 3142 in Gemini. It appeared as a hamburger. (Hmm, it had been a while since dinner). Next, I checked out NGC 6782. It looked a bit like a Black Rider hunting for Frodo. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I checked off Abell 75 in Sagittarius. It was like that graph in An Unpleasant Truth. Then, I helped a beginner find B 76 in Orion. It appeared in the eyepiece like dandruff on black satin pajamas. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I tried for NGC 3939 in Triangulum. It was a blurry likeness of Dubya. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I glimpsed NGC 771 in Camelopardalis. It glowed, rather like lumpy darkness. Then, for a real challenge, I glimpsed NGC 3153 in Sculptor. It was not quite as bright as 60 grit carborundum on asphalt.
Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than sex.