My observing report

As I drove up the winding road to Twin Peaks, I idly mused upon the impact upon modern astronomy of Dilbert as I contemplated the approaching chlorofluorocarbons ... would it be warmer tonight?. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 42 telescopes set up.

I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 71. It looked exactly like a far-away cloud. After that, I tracked down IC 757. It looked like that graph in An Unpleasant Truth. With that checked off my list, I found by accident M 96. It was even more difficult than its Hubble photograph. Next, I tried for IC 3013. It looked a bit like one of Martha Stewart's doilies. After that, I looked for and suspected IC 3139. It was not quite as bright as the face of God. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I studied B 24 in Cygnus. It looked like 60 grit carborundum on asphalt. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I sketched M 32 in Draco. It was better than whipped cream. After that, I had a chance to see M 21. It looked like cotton on velvet. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I jumped to NGC 5968. It reminded me of its Hubble photograph. After that, I tried M 22. It was even more difficult than lumpy darkness. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I looked for and suspected Abell 30 in Ophiuchus. It was easy, just like the face of God.

After a short break to do some yoga, I sketched M 27. It was as bright as the exhaust from a diesel Suburban. With that checked off my list, I studied IC 3108 in Lynx. It seemed most like black pearls on flocked paper. After that, I checked out NGC 5192 in Lepus. It somewhat resembled dandruff on black satin pajamas. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I hunted NGC 3884 in Fornax. It compared favorably with black pearls on flocked paper. With that checked off my list, I glimpsed B 563. It was easy, just like the eye of God. Next, I looked at B 362. It gave the appearance of a spider. After that, I located NGC 1469. It was better than a cantilever bra.

After a short break to find a bush to pee on, I tracked down M 8 in Camelopardalis. It appeared at low power like dandruff on black satin pajamas.

Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than being ravaged by savage wild wombats.


    ...Akkana (with help from David North, Jane Houston Jones, and Bill Arnett) .

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