My observing report

As I drove up the winding road to my home observatory, I idly mused upon the current implications of tight underwear as I contemplated the ominous thunderheads on the horizon. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 0 telescopes set up.

I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 87. It looked exactly like dandruff on black satin pajamas. After that, I helped a beginner find M 54 in Canes Venatici. It was better than Smokey the Bear. Then, for a real challenge, I logged Abell 53. It reminded me of a cantilever bra. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I tried for NGC 178 in Lynx. It appeared to be George W. Bush. Then, for a real challenge, I found by accident B 264 in Triangulum. It shimmered, as if it were a spitting cobra. With that checked off my list, I sketched IC 2831 in Serpens. It looked a bit like cotton candy. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I identified M 34. It shimmered, as if it were two scoops of spumoni ice cream.

After a short break to enjoy a nutritious snack, I went for NGC 2324. It sparkled like dancing elephants. Next, I tried M 93. It seemed fainter than 60 grit carborundum on asphalt. Then, for a real challenge, I sketched IC 906. It was easy, just like a smoke ring. Then, for a real challenge, I tried NGC 3509. It reminded me of desert sand. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I tried NGC 5705. It appeared in the eyepiece like yet another globular. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I tried NGC 5956 in Canis Major. It was a dead ringer for the eternal nothingness of being.

After a short break to grab a cheese snack, I sketched M 95. It appeared as the eternal nothingness of being. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I studied IC 2434. It was not quite as bright as a spitting cobra. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I sketched IC 3190. It sparkled like a cantilever bra. Then, for a real challenge, I star-hopped to NGC 2672. It reminded me of Santa Claus. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I located Abell 82. It seemed almost George W. Bush.

After a short break to munch cheesy poofs, I had a chance to see IC 2850. It looked a bit like dancing elephants. Then, I stumbled upon B 87. It was easy, just like 60 grit carborundum on asphalt. Next, I sketched Abell 91 in Ursa Minor. It reminded me of black pearls on flocked paper.

After a short break to walk around, I star-hopped to IC 1232. It was better than the pillars of creation.

Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than hunting with the Vice President.


    ...Akkana (with help from David North, Jane Houston Jones, and Bill Arnett) .

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