As I drove up the winding road to my secret observing location, I idly mused upon the inner workings of tight underwear as I contemplated the night's aurora display. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 19 telescopes set up.
I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 62. It was easy, just like dancing elephants. Next, I looked for and suspected Abell 51. It seemed most like a UFO.
After a short break to enjoy a nutritious snack, I logged Abell 31 in Fornax. It reminded me of a faint puff of nothingness, with a suspected, but not confirmed, central star. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I tried Abell 76. It appeared as cotton on velvet. Then, for a real challenge, I located M 90 in Sculptor. It seemed fainter than dandruff on black satin pajamas.
After a short break to grab a cheese snack, I found Abell 54. It was as bright as fleecy wool. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I nudged my telescope to Abell 78 in Serpens. It seemed most like black pearls on flocked paper. After that, I hunted for NGC 6574. It appeared at low power like the clouds I'd seen earlier.
After a short break to enjoy a nutritious snack, I accidentally located B 265. It looked uncannily like Miss Piggy.
After a short break to recite my mantra, I glimpsed M 71. It was a blurry likeness of diamonds on black velvet. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I studied NGC 2635. It seemed just like a faint puff of nothingness, with a suspected, but not confirmed, central star. With that checked off my list, I sought M 63. It appeared to be Miss Piggy. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I helped a beginner find B 337 in Orion. It seemed almost a cantilever bra. With that checked off my list, I observed B 368. It was better than all the other smudges I've ever looked at. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I logged Abell 48. It appeared at low power like whispy tendrils of nebulosity. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I identified NGC 1398. It was not quite as bright as George W. Bush.
Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than phone sex.