Shallow Thoughts : : humor

Watch out, or you'll end up in Pleasant Valley

I love this sign, along Interstate 5 near Coalinga. Pleasant Valley State Prison.

I guess if you have to be locked away, Pleasant Valley doesn't sound like the worst place to be.

Do Pleasant Valley ex-cons have a hard time getting respect when people find out where they did their hard time?

I love picturing the local parents trying to strike fear into their kids' hearts. "If you don't straighten up, Junior, you're going to end up in ... PLEASANT VALLEY!"

Or the local judges -- "You're not getting off this time. No, I'm giving you ten years in ... PLEASANT VALLEY!"

Tags: humor, travel
[ 17:07 Feb 02, 2012    More humor | permalink to this entry | comments ]

Increase Your ... Pancakes?

This coupon showed up on a Safeway receipt.

Everyone I've showed it to has the same reaction as I did: stacks of pancakes! Oh, wait, the headline says ... oh, I see, I guess those are supposed to be coins.

I'm not sure what the lesson is ... maybe that you should show your ad to a few other people before publishing it.

Or maybe the program is actually for cafe owners looking to increase their breakfast sales ...

Tags: humor, imaging, advertising
[ 11:26 Nov 08, 2011    More humor | permalink to this entry | comments ]

Android/Eclipse Spellchecker is a bit confused

I've been doing some Android development, using the standard Eclipse development tools. A few days ago, I pasted some code that included a comment about different Android versions, and got a surprise:

What do you think -- should I change all the "Android" references to "Undried"?

Tags: humor, android, eclipse, programming
[ 10:09 Dec 07, 2010    More humor | permalink to this entry | comments ]

The non-dairy dairy

On a recent desert trip, we stopped in Jean, NV for some prime rib.

They had creamer containers out on the table in case you should order coffee. It was their own brand of non-dairy creamer. I wonder who really makes it?

Silly question -- the non-dairy creamer comes from a dairy! And includes "sodium caseinate (a milk derivative)".

Leaves me full of curiosity about the cows at this dairy ...

Tags: humor, food
[ 16:39 Oct 23, 2010    More humor | permalink to this entry | comments ]

Can you read this?

Got this in the mail. Awfully thoughtful of them, don't you think? I'm sure all the people who can't read it will call right away.

Tags: humor
[ 20:00 Aug 08, 2010    More humor | permalink to this entry | comments ]

Slow news day?

My favorite headline from today's paper:

Waves breach sand berm

What sort of sand berm, you wonder, that merits a headline in the paper? No doubt a critical one, protecting the town from the ravages of the sea? Well, maybe not:

"The situation is not unusual," he added. "It happens every year."

I guess it was a slow news day.

The full-page ad on the back of the main section was good, too.

Mmmmm ... melamine candy!

Tags: humor, headlines, slownewsday
[ 11:42 Dec 29, 2009    More humor | permalink to this entry | comments ]

A new theory of orbital dynamics

This PG&E billboard just went up down the street from where I live.

"Solar Power: Making planets orbit and bagels toast."

And here all this time I'd been under the impression that orbits had mostly to do with gravity. Somehow I'd missed the influence of light pressure when writing my orbital software.

Or is the sun's gravitational influence considered a part of "solar power"? Can we look forward to the upcoming generation of gravitovoltaic solar cells?

Tags: humor, astronomy
[ 19:13 Sep 18, 2009    More humor | permalink to this entry | comments ]

Classic cellphone billboard

On 101 southbound a little south of University Ave in Palo Alto, a new billboard cropped up a month or so ago. It says:

Senator Joe Simitian: Your cell phone law sucks.

Well, that's not ALL it says. Actually, it says quite a lot of other stuff. In small print. So much so that if you actually tried to read it, you'd be virtually guaranteed to veer out of your lane and into another car.

I loved it. It's so classic. For anyone who hasn't heard, California has a new law this year that bans talking on a hand-held cell phone while driving. And honestly, who would think that it was possible to read a billboard like this while driving -- except one of those people who veers their SUV into your lane because they're too immersed in their cellphone conversation to pay attention to the road?

(For a better photo or if you actually want to read the text, the LA Times has the billboard story and photo; here's the Mercury news take, with more details on the 75-word message (no photo).)

Tags: humor, irony, cellphone
[ 20:53 Mar 10, 2009    More humor | permalink to this entry | comments ]